25 Things You Should Not Do in Korea
by
Sean Lardner
Mention the Sea of Japan; it’s the East Sea.
Assume traffic stops when the light turns red.
Refer to the Takeshima Island; it’s known as Tok-Do.
Dis Kimchi.
Assume sidewalks are only for pedestrians.
Believe someone who says “maybe no problem.”
Forget to examine your jja jang myun for cockroaches.
Count on an “appointment” with your students to last less than the rest of the day.
Get romantically involved with your students.
Identify yourself as employed by, supportive of, or somehow associated with, the IMF.
Believe the girl friend who tells you it’s her first time.
Believe the boy friend who tells you there are no others.
Bother trying to learn all the different names (in Korean) for various relatives; there are an infinite number of relationships.
Avoid eye contact with other foreigners on the street. Is it that difficult to smile and say hello?
Wait for the exchange rate to return to the good old days of 750, or even 900.
Criticize unmotivated students unless you’ve worked their long hours and managed to learn Korean in your off-hours.
Belittle Korean women as weak and submissive; after all, they control the money, and some of the older ones can elbow and cross-check with the best.
Forget to tread carefully in front of drinking establishments; you may step in last night’s soju, kimchi and rice.
Mock the alleged health benefits of Korean food.
Reinforce bad English by using Konglish with students when you can’t get a point across to them.
Try to convince your students that not all Westerners eat hamburgers every day.
Reminisce about the good old days of the Japanese occupation.
Ask your friend about their test results; if he or she does not volunteer their score, you probably shouldn’t ask.
Expect your bonus or retirement pay without a fight.
Swallow that octopus without chewing; it may try to climb back up into your mouth.
Copyright © 2002 Worldbridges
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